This is not me. But it is what Squarespace thinks I look like.

more than you'd ever need to know About THis COPYWRITER

1. I don't have a uvula. This means that food sometimes goes up my nose via my mouth. One time an entire Sweedish Fish came out my nose. Honest. Learn about uvulas here. Be grateful for your uvula.

2. Eating candy (Skittles, Starbursts, various candy bars, etc.) gives me "hot flashes." They make my head/face sweat. I have asked my mother what this means. She assures me that my bone density is great (this is a menopause joke) and that I need not worry . I'll show you what I mean if we ever meet. In the mean time learn more about menopause and osteoporosis here and here

3. I own a mounted jackalope. Should I produce a male offspring, this jackalope will be passed down to him. I would like him to continue the tradition of handing down the jackalope to the next generation, but I'm pretty sure the world will end by the time my grandson should be getting a turn. All good things must come to an end, I guess.

4. I go by all iterations of the name Robert with the exception of Bob. Bob George just doesn't do it for me.

The hardest part about allowing you into my digital realm is that my best work is yet to be created. It waits, somewhere, in the not too distant future. In the mean time, feel free to peruse at your leisure.